Hard.

*
Phew~ this is really hard.

unconsciously (or rather consciously) i fumbled into your site, even when i'm not suppose to.

your post. re: Aiks... I think i know why God didn't want you to cometo church on Sturday.

 I don't want to make a wild guess, but it seems pretty straightforward to me. 

Today my sis went for baptism in church. Yea. It was wonderful to see her making a commitment, honestly, i did doubt if she even understands the meaning of it... but at the age of 11, she knows what she's doing. 

So, i'm just gonna support.

It has been 2 weeks. Each week I have been having errands to run about, including my parents. 

1. 2 weeks ago~ mom had something on, didn't go for bible study. 
2. Last week was because my relatives came down and had some registration to follow up. 
3. This week---which means tomorrow---I might not be in Youth service, because my mom has errands to go~ transport thingy and all...

no worries, i might not be in church, but i'm still equally active in CF~ 

maybe slightly more than usual, actually.

I so miss church, luckily today is baptism service, i get to worship my heart (and lungs) out ^^ 

[and with Ian and Ivan too~].

You know, to me it's just too obvious. 3 weeks in a row...not seeing you at all. God's plan?

"God, if it's your plan then i will accept it. You want good for both of us."

Maybe...just maybe, i should not really "unconsciously" go through your stuffs anymore. It's a clear cut from God, right? I must be lying if i was THAT strong to take it in. ALL of this. 

At least, give me the determination to do this once more. 

I'm serious. Don't expect me to do this alone.

just make sure we take the right one. And with God.